Still In The Woods

Alas, latest count check showed that the cancer is still present, LKC was at 18 (a bit too high). The healing session with the guides was incredible but I did have a feeling that I wasn't quite done with Leukemia yet. I will know when that time comes and then it is time for the knight to lose this lady. Or die trying. Haha.

The healing felt a lot like it was laying down foundations for future work, perhaps my own, or maybe in preparation for an actual visit to Brazil where I can get the healing in person. Who can say really, it is all too complex and far beyond our mortal minds to try and understand the intricacies of a soul's journey.

All I must do is keep doing what I do. Feel what comes and work with it. Keep punching fear in the face until it is so disfigured it won't make a reappearance. Continue to see illusion in that which seems so incredibly real and thus shattering it's power over me. And of course ultimately surrendering entirely to the whole situation, because in that act you are stating that you are unafraid, that you are not caught in the illusion, and that you are divinity. Surrender is the key, thats what they tell me. I know I havn't reached that point yet and so I knew I wasn't done with cancer. Going for the Fleece!

But we ask you to reach toward surrender
even as you continue the battle
for this is the prize
this is the chalice
this is the Golden Fleece

Be free first
beautiful heart
and then all
will be well.

p.s. I actually just got a sheep skin blanket to lie on and it is soooo comfortable hahaha. Last time I lay on one was when I was a newborn. I recommend them for all. I also wear it on my shoulders and walk around like a barbarian. Win.